9 Things You Need To Know To Begin Again

begin again

We have it in our power to begin again

Tragedy happens. People die. Relationships end. Jobs are lost. Parenting feels like a thankless job. The life you have may not be like you expected it to be.

Pain, loss, setbacks and disappointment are a part of life. You feel paralyzed by fear.

Life isn’t always smooth sailing.

Sometimes, when things get tough and the pain feels unbearable, you only need to take the step in front of you.

Be courageous. Decide to take one step at a time. Move through your fear. Choose to begin again.

One step at a time is enough for the path in front of you to become clear. Eventually the light will shine again. I can promise you that.


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Begin again when:

You lose a friend or two. Things change, they move on. You’re cut off. Mourn. Make new friends. Begin again.

You lose a job or get laid off. You make a bad investment and you’re drowning in debt. Reinvent yourself. Begin again.

You end a relationship or your spouse files for divorce. Your adult children won’t speak to you. Forgive everyone.  Include yourself. Begin again.

You fail. You mess up a project. Nobody cares. You lose your time, energy and money. Learn from it. Begin again.

You are angry. You were overcharged. You lost your receipt. The line is long. You’re kicking yourself. Let it go. Begin again.

You feel distant from people. You ignore the ones you love. You meet your friends for a drink. One turns into five. Stop drinking. Get help. Begin again.

You get sick. A friend gets cancer. Your pet is aging. A parent dies. You question the meaning of life.  Be kind to yourself. Begin again.

You are exhausted. Your sink is clogged. The car is in the shop. You’re behind in your house payments. Make a plan. Begin again.

You gain weight. You’re too tired to exercise. You are unmotivated. You’re dying inside. Take a deep breath and one tiny step. Begin again.

You cannot quit crying. Your son is on drugs. Your purse is missing. You feel like a failure. You hate life. Reach out. Begin again.

You cannot calm down or get it together. You isolate and sleep too much. You feel like a mess. Make a plan. Begin again.

The difficult times are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom. ~ Elizabeth Lesser

Here’s how to begin again:

Surround yourself with people who care. Allow yourself to lean on someone. You don’t have to suffer or struggle alone. Receive the kindness that others offer you. Simply say thank you.

Sit in silence. Don’t numb you pain. Get quiet. Let it bubble up. Breathe. Lean into it. Keep breathing. It will pass.

Change your perspective. Replace your fear with love. Commit to love. Love is an attitude. Love is a verb or a way of life. Love is an activity. Participate in it. Your world will change.

Surrender. Don’t hang on to anger. When you feel like you are being unfairly treated or when you feel like you’ve been left behind, surrender. Trust the process.  Life has an ebb and flow. This too shall pass. It always has. It always will.

Take good care of yourself. Go to the gym. Eat right. Get enough sleep. Pamper yourself. In difficult times be your own best friend.

Get help. Find a support group. Hire a coach. See a therapist. You may want someone to help you sort things out. You can’t see the whole picture. You may not know how to start over. Reach out.

Take responsibility. It’s up to you to be strong and keep going. It’s up to you to make a plan. Nobody is coming to save you.

Help others. There is always someone who needs help even more than you do. Being of service will leave you with a natural high. Look around and find someone who needs you.

Find joy and lightness. Look for a reason to smile. Notice beauty everywhere. Take long walks. Watch small children play. There is meaning and beauty to be found even in the midst of pain. 

The wonderful thing about life is that you can begin again anytime you wish. You can wipe the slate clean. Get back on the horse. Carry on. Again. And again. And again. Isn’t life grand?

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Cathy Taughinbaugh July 20, 2014, 8:24 pm

    Great suggestions here, Tess. I love the idea to surround yourself with people who care when you are struggling. Too often people shut down when they are going through challenges, but your suggestion to reach out is a good one. Thanks for the encouragement to begin again!

    • Tess July 21, 2014, 12:41 pm


      When life is difficult it’s the best thing to do. It eases our pain immediately.

  • sandy July 21, 2014, 3:18 am

    This is just what I needed today. Thank You!

    • Tess July 21, 2014, 12:42 pm

      Your welcome Sandy! xo

  • Beth July 21, 2014, 8:13 am

    So timely for me, Tess. As an old friend of mine used to say, “Have you been reading my mail again?”

    My heart is a bit heavy today because it’s the anniversary of my mom’s death. So glad though that I realized I HAD to begin again. Not only is that what she would have wanted, but I owed it to myself.

    Thanks for always cutting right to the chase!

    • Tess July 21, 2014, 12:42 pm

      Love to you Beth. I’m sure she’d be proud of where you are today! x

  • Sebastian Aiden Daniels July 21, 2014, 8:19 am

    Beginning Again is tough, but it is well worth it. I’m in an interesting point in my life that I am trying to navigate. I have to say the biggest of those nine things for me is Change Perspective. Change it to love, but also change your experiences of what you lost to joy. Remember the positives and how you can learn from the experience rather than on what you lost. Life is series of endings and beginnings. If we can get good at those then success is easier to come by.

  • Tess July 21, 2014, 12:43 pm

    Thanks for you wonderful thoughts. You amaze me!

  • Joshua Tilghman July 21, 2014, 5:55 pm


    Some amazing and life-giving advice here. This is something we all need to hear, because we have all been through these painful experiences, but true growth comes THROUGH them, not by wallowing in them. And, most importantly of course, by beginning again. Thanks for the awesome post!

  • richmiraclefiles July 25, 2014, 9:11 am

    Hi Tess,
    One major shift in attidude is to seek encouragement from within,when you want to resume a failed project again.
    Encourage yourself a lot.Encourage yourself particularly about the past successes you have achieved.No one in this world is a complete failure,and no one is a complete success either.There is mix of both for every one.
    Yet super successful people are those who succeed more often.That’s because they think differently about failure.They do not start permanently camping in failure.They seek encouragement from their previous successes .That’s all you need to do too.

  • Eden August 4, 2014, 10:31 pm

    Hey what a great idea for a post. I’ve found that it’s true what you said above, “taking care of myself during difficult times” has worked wonders for my confidence and health. And waistline 🙂

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