Bold Living + Wildly Successful


"Guts are a combination of confidence, courage, conviction, strength of character,
stick-to-itiveness, backbone, and intestinal fortitude."
~ D. A. Benton

Fear can be a motivator. Learn how to use it. Refuse to live in overwhelm. The key is to thrive, not strive.

When life seems too big and you're feeling small, remember to breathe. 

Remember the brave times. When you got it right. 

Remember that top-of-the-world feeling. When you didn't think it could get much better.

Remember that. Because it can get better. It will. 

This is a good time to be alive. It's your time! It's time to be bold. To dare. To risk.

The following tips will get you out of a valley and back to the top of the mountain. Choose one. Take Action. Begin today.

Be a beginner. Do something brand new. Be open to the different and the difficult. Push yourself. Follow someone’s lead. Ask questions. Try. Fail. Try again. Fail again. Succeed.

I’m currently working on a series of Kindle books. It’s new territory for me. I can’t wait to share them with you!

Focus. Focus. Focus. Take small calculated steps to get to your end goal. Don’t give your fear attention or energy. Let it die a slow death. It’s less scary to build your courage muscles one action step at a time.

It’s all about positive images. Let go of what you don’t want and visualize what you do. Stop running negative images in your mind of bad things happening. Create the image of the outcome you want and dwell on it. Work towards it. Each time you feel fearful, replace it with your successful image.

Take your fear on a run. When you are stuck in fear and feel paralyzed by negativity, get active. Lift weights, run or walk off your fear. Move physically. Motivate yourself with a play list of your favorite positive songs. 

Use affirmations and quotes. I write down positive quotes and affirmations on index cards and put them in my car, bathroom, bedroom and kitchen. It only takes a few minutes to see things differently and change emotions.

Surrender all attack thoughts and negativity. We project our own negativity and fear when we get caught up in drama and become envious of the success of others. Somebody else’s success has nothing to do with yours. Choose to be happy for people who get what you want. Learn to say and mean, “Good for them.” Focus on taking action on your own behalf.

Stop doubting yourself. Change your perception and change your story. Become aware of the stories you tell yourself about your self-worth, intelligence, strengths and possibilities. Own your greatness. Create stories that resonate with the beautiful person you are. No one else can do it for you.

Expect to succeed. Tell yourself things are going well. Know that people want to help you. Spin new stories about the future. You have a choice. You can expect the best or the worst. Why wouldn’t you choose the best? Every day you can create new expectations. 

Choose to enjoy life. Fear can lead to a work addiction. When you lack balance in your life it shows up in your relationships, business and health. Carve out time to laugh and play. Get away from all electronics and get your fun meter running. Dance, hike, begin a new hobby and laugh as often as possible. Find joy throughout the day. 

This is your life. Be fearless, daring, juicy, wild and crazy. Balance it with peace, quiet and serenity. The alternative to facing your fears is that your fears will control you. Don’t miss out on opportunities. Don’t cheat the people who will benefit from your gifts. Life is meant to be lived out loud and in joy. This is your time. Live the bold life.

"Only one thing matters, one thing; to be able to dare!" ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky

If you know someone who is feeling down, please share my message with them!

An article I wrote on my mom's transition has been voted for one of the top 20 of The Greatest Self Development Posts Ever Written – check it out!

Please share your thoughts below.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Vidya Sury March 6, 2012, 10:57 am

    Ah, Yes! All this works for me. I love the points here, Tess – feels good to know I am on the right track – namely – one that works and one that takes me forward! Yay!

    I keep telling my son these, one at a time – but I think I’ll email this post to him to quietly read ๐Ÿ™‚ After all, Guru -Speak makes big impact! For teenagers, especially, we need to remind them subtly and gently, to stop doubting themselves and forge ahead. ๐Ÿ™‚

    As always, a valuable read!

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:44 pm

      There’s no doubt in my mind you’re on track! Your love for others shines through in everything you right. That’s the boldest think one can do is to love all;)

  • Steve Marquez March 6, 2012, 11:09 am

    Love this Tess! So uplifting and perfect timing, I’m feeling exactly what you’re talking about in the post – really positive and in a really good space. I’m choosing life, I’m choosing to succeed and I am very grateful.

    Your post made me smile – thank you.


    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:44 pm

      Hi Steve,
      You’re in an awesome spot. Stay there, soak it in, and enjoy!

  • Fran Sorin March 6, 2012, 11:09 am

    Some really fine points that I so appreciate being reminded of…. .
    I love your phrase ‘work can be a fear addiction’. I see it as two pronged. You can work hard because you’re afraid of living…and you can work hard because you’re afraid of not succeeding.
    I am disciplining myself to be computer free at least for one day of the week. And work at not turning on the computer for a large chunk of the day. Ahhh…and my rule about writing..up to 3 hours a day (although I’m not always successful). There is SO many exciting things to do….that’s the good news.
    Can’t wait to see your Kindle e-books. They’ll be terrific. ๐Ÿ™‚ fran

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:45 pm

      One day free from your computer must be a day filled with joy. You’re very wise, but we already knew that;)

  • b March 6, 2012, 11:14 am

    OK…you have me. I am putting you on my blog list. My readers need to see this!



    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:46 pm

      That sounds like a great idea! I’m grateful for your support.

  • Charlotte Rains Dixon March 6, 2012, 11:49 am

    These are great tips, thanks. Yesterday I was talking with a friend on the phone and she said when she starts feeling low and sludgy she purposefully begins to lift herself up. I want to start being more purposeful about my emotions as well, and your blog is a great starting point.

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:47 pm

      That makes me feel like I’m doing my job! I’m here to be truly helpful!

  • Sandra / Always Well Within March 6, 2012, 12:11 pm

    These are meaningful tips in my eyes. I appreciate the wisdom of rejoicing in other peoples’ success. This is easy to do and it actually brings you more joy. I love the idea of taking small steps. I embrace the idea of transforming negative thoughts.

    I would add “to know yourself.” I know I need to modulate over-stimulation in my life. I need to discover how to be bold in a quiet way. So this struck me as a key to the whole affair for me:

    “This is your life. Be fearless, daring, juicy, wild, and crazy. Balance it with peace, quiet, and serenity.”

    This is meaty advice. Thank you!

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:48 pm

      Just so you know I’m taking my own advice as well:) xo

  • Karen March 6, 2012, 2:45 pm

    Another great reminder of how to live fully – I love your descriptions ‘can’t wait to
    share it with you’ and the word ‘juicy’. I will accept your challenge and become a beginner – at living a successful and abundant life. Jumping over the line in the sand.

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:48 pm

      I love it…jumpin’ over the line in the sand. Me too!

  • Steve Rice March 6, 2012, 4:15 pm

    Tess, I love this list. It strikes me that many of the “tips” you gave have with surrendering or allowing something. Over and over again, I’m led back to this theme of non-resistance. It really is a wonderful way to live in the world. I wonder how life would be if one could perpetually live in that state? Hmmm…something to really think about. Probably would be well worth the practice.

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:49 pm

      If I could live in a state of non-resistance every moment…I’d have inner peace 24/7!

  • Cathy | Treatment Talk March 6, 2012, 4:31 pm

    Hi Tess,

    Very inspiring! You’ve got me energized just reading this post. I particularly like this one – Use affirmations and quotes, and how you post them around the house. That is a great idea. Quotes can really change our thinking.

    I love your idea of being bold and fearless and balancing it with peace and serenity.
    Awesome – thanks!

    • Tess March 6, 2012, 7:50 pm

      I appreciate your support. It helps my commitment to see them in a lot of places. I keep them in baggies so they don’t spill out all over;)

  • Elle March 6, 2012, 4:57 pm

    Another ‘bold’ post Tess, filled with wonderful tips. I think you’re spot on when you suggest just take one…the secret is to begin…somewhere…anywhere just begin. Any of these tips, when practiced would make an enormous difference in a life.
    Thanks again Tess for your wise words.
    Encourage one another.

    • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:53 am

      Yes procrastination comes from being overwhelmed. The bigger the job the smaller the first step…unless you’re the type that likes to dive right in. It’s kind of like the turtle and the hare. In the end it all begins with one step, big or small.

  • Angela Artemis/Poweredbyintuition March 6, 2012, 5:22 pm

    Great advice Tess!
    I love this: The key to life is to thrive not strive. So true!
    Definitely, take chances and put yourself out there, then allow yourself to go with the flow as you thrive.
    Excellent advice.

    • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:54 am

      I know when I’m striving there’s fear and doubt involved. We don’t have to wait until the finish line to thrive. We can start in the moment.

  • Suzie Cheel March 6, 2012, 5:52 pm

    Must be something in the air- Just finished reading a book this morning on success that uplifted me and then I find your wonderful post- just love the image and taking your fear on a run- I think no 1 FOCUS – like how Mari Smith uses this
    On one
    Something I still have to master
    thanks for your bold post

    • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:54 am

      This is great. Thanks for sharing!

  • Paige | simple mindfulness March 6, 2012, 7:53 pm

    So many awesome ideas!! They remind us that fear is a state of mind that we can choose to change and move past in many different ways.

    Getting up and out and moving really helps me to change my perspective. I live in the mountains and just going outside on the front porch and taking a few deep breaths can give me a completely different outlook.

    Thanks so much and good luck with the Kindle books!!

    • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:56 am

      Oh I love mountains. Love them. When hiking on Monday morning and got a new perspective after 3 minutes on the trail.

  • Tathata March 7, 2012, 12:04 am

    “Choose to enjoy life.”

    This expression has recently shown new meaning to me:
    Sometimes, when I am especially down (depressed or whatever you’d like to call it), there is literally nothing in the world that can lift me up. I am unable to MAKE myself calm, happy… what have you. It just isn’t possible in that moment, although I know the dark times will pass. They always do.

    What I CAN choose to do though, is to not let myself go deeper into dispair. I can choose to stop the self-destructive thought process and clear my mind by thinking of nothing, or counting my breaths…or doing whatever it is I do to stop beating myself up. To me, that’s what it means to “choose to enjoy life”

    Thanks for this post! Your words are inspiring and uplifting!

    • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:58 am

      I’m happy that you find something that helps lift you up on my blog. Thanks for stopping by and letting me know. Take care!

  • Anne-Sophie March 7, 2012, 4:54 am

    I love that you’ve mentioned using affirmations. I am a firm believer in mantras and repeating positive sentences has helped me many times when I felt like giving up, especially when I fought my eating disorder. You cannot underestimate the power of a positive mind. The more positive you think the more you will believe in yourself and the more possibilities you will see in life.

  • Tess March 7, 2012, 4:59 am

    Never underestimate the power of a positive mind…such power and truth in the statement. Thanks for sharing. Yes I do love affirmations and mantras. They work for me.

  • Galen Pearl March 8, 2012, 3:52 pm

    I am trying something new–nunchucks! They are martial arts weapons, the two sticks joined by a chain. Think Bruce Lee! Since I got my black belt last fall, I’ve wanted to start working with weapons. I am not taking lessons with nunchucks. I’m telling you, a 60 year old grandmother in a taekwondo uniform whirling nunchucks around is a sight to behold! Of course mostly I’m trying not to knock my teeth out–ha!

    But you know what I liked best? Surrender all attack thoughts and negativity. Attack thoughts are so poisonous. Even little ones. That is so crucial, so thank you for highlighting that.

  • Noel March 9, 2012, 12:58 am

    Hi Tess, we can easily get paralyzed by negativity, don’t we? ;>
    Hence I think the way to get rid of fear and doubt is to – do something! Just like Pauline R. Kezer said: “When you do nothing, you feel overwhelmed and powerless. But when you get involved, you feel the sense of hope and accomplishment that comes from knowing you are working to make things better.”
    And I like your various tips on leading a positive and bold life, very useful! Thanks Tess!

  • Bill Polm March 9, 2012, 4:20 pm

    It’s all good, Tess. You’re a wonder.

    I especially noticed “Remember the brave times. When you got it right.”

    Now to my credit (it’s good to get a little credit) I do that, and I also advise others to do that, particularly on Yahoo Answers in the psych section, lots of teens I think who want more confidence and a better self-image. I tell them, “Celebrate those victories, make them indelible in your memory, have a little party of one. Learn from your mistakes as much as you can, then move on” etc.

    You’re on your way, plenty of readers, comments, good stuff (content).

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