photo credit: Andre Queiroz
Today is Magical Monday!
Peggy McColl is donating her double CD program, “Turning Faith into Fear” to the person who leaves the best comment today!
Which of these common “fear markers” are yours?
- If you changed jobs you would fail
- Your relationship stinks – but at least it’s secure
- You can’t try a new way of life you may fail
- You’ve got a house, car, payments, you can’t take risks
- It’s too easy to get hurt in a new relationship
- If that cool business idea didn’t work, out it would be humiliating
- You’ve got kids, it’s about them now, not you
- The world has gotten so scary – you have to play it safe
- Life is hard and that’s just the way it is
Do you have the fears above? If so, know that you can:
- Make a sudden, radical shift to confidence, faith and success
- Attain the prosperity you’ve concluded is just for “others”
- Feel passionate about life and what it holds for you
- Stare fear in the face and laugh at it
- Do the things you have dreamed of, but thought impossible
- Dust yourself off when you DO fail and move on to success
- Stop caring what others think
- Love what you do for a living & wake up eager to face the day
- Share your new-found confidence and joy with those around you
- Become a magnet for opportunities and wealth
- Know what it’s like for people to be irresistibly attracted to you
What will YOU decide? To accept the life you have now as “just the way it is.” Or, to conquer your fears and live a life you hardly dare to think possible?Only you can make this decision – and unless you do, nobody can make it happen for you!
Who is Peggy McColl?
Peggy McColl, is a New York Times best selling author and internet marketer. She turned a life of insecurity and need into a life of incredible success. She is highly sought-after as a speaker and seminar leader on success, wealth and living an abundant life. You can hear her on Hay House Radio on Wednesdays 10-11 PDT
She is the author of several books including:
- On Being . . . The Creator of Your Destiny (Now Out of Print)
- The 8 Proven Secrets to SMART Success (Now Out of Print)
- Be A Dog With A Bone Always Go For Your Dreams
- Your Destiny Switch; Master Your Key Emotions and Attract the Life of Your Dreams
- 21 Distinctions of Wealth; Attract the Abundance You Deserve
- The Won Thing; The One Secret to a Totally Fulfilling Life
Carolynn from A Glowing Member is the winner for The Bottomline Book Club.
Kath from Virtual Imax is the winner of Jan Lundy’s book.
What is your biggest fear?
How do you deal with fear?
What’s one thing you would like others to know about fear?
Leave your comment below the winner gets Peggy’s CD’s.
Please join The Bold Life for free and receive my free guide, Peace, Love, and Connection. Please share this post with a Tweet and a Like.
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{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
That is a very interesting thing to read about because it is very real to me. My biggest fear in life is change. And funnily enough, in the last few years, I have changed a whole lot.
When I was about to graduate from college, fear hit me. Well, I should say that real life hit me. School was all I knew for over sixteen years. What was I supposed to do with my time if I wasn’t doing calculus problems and reading new novels that requires reports written about them? What would I do without my study groups and for the love of God what would my job be now that I didn’t get to tutor other college kids in mathematics at the Math Lab Academic Center?
I was lost. I was scared. I had absolutely no choice but to change. So I did.
I think that sometimes our biggest fears need embracing. Sometimes we need a little push. Sometimes we need to have no other choice than to jump head first (or feet first if you’re really still going to jump) right into that fear.
Changing wasn’t easy for me, though. I wouldn’t even say I jumped feet first into my fears. Heck, I didn’t even jump. I slithered down and climbed back up again and then I plummeted… the wrong way.
Before I knew it I withdrew all my classes for the semester. Maybe if school took longer, I wouldn’t have to embrace the thing that scared me the most: change. I didn’t want to change and I’d do everything I could to stop it.
One day, while I was playing video games in my parent’s basement, putting off doing my homework in my last year of college, it hit me. I finally got that last bit of motivation that had been planted inside me since all this fear had started. I finally was able to push myself that last little bit and face my fear.
It was the best thing I ever did.
A few years later, I’m a college graduate with a dual major in mathematics and computer science, I have a teaching job that I love, I am married to a wonderful man, I have moved out of my parent’s house, and my husband and I are planning to move overseas to New Zealand sometime within the year. I couldn’t be happier.
The only thing that I can say about fears is to just jump right in and face them. It could make all the difference.
Hi Tess. I’m feeling pretty good right now. There is only one fear-marker that applies to me in this list and that is “It’s too easy to get hurt in a new relationship.” But then again, I’ve only had one new relationship in the past 12 years so I’m not even sure if that one applies now. When we stop caring what others think, we move in leaps and bounds.
Oh my good friend, fear… It’s served me so wonderfully in the past, and will probably continue to serve me in the future. Like anything in life, though, I know that fear serves a purpose. Usually that purpose is asking me to question what role it plays in helping me get what I really REALLY want.
In the past I’ve struggled with the thought of breaking up with someone who wasn’t soul-searchingly right for me (but didn’t always feel wrong). I’d think, “If they’re out of my life and I don’t have access to them anymore, how will I…?” (They usually had some talent beyond the relationship that I relied on, like being able to fix things, or design web sites, or … fill in the blank.) Oddly, when I finally faced the fear and affirmed that I’m always provided for, I’d meet someone new who had that same skill and then some.
The most recent fear that popped into my head when I read this post, though, was “snakes.” I know that’s not what you had in mind, but still! I’ve had an inexplicable fear of the little buggers since I was born (maybe before!). What’s the worst that could happen if I came across one? I need to investigate this more…
Yeah! I’m a winner – I’m a winner!!! Thank you Tess!!!
As for the topic of fear – fighting fear seems to be a never ending battle for me. It seems like when I’ve got it beat – it comes roaring back with even more intensity!
My mother used fear to control me as a child and those child rearing strategies seem to dog me even today as my own children prepare to leave “my nest”.
Fear paralyzes – which makes it a GREAT device to control someone’s behavior. When you mix “fear” with perfectionism – you have the perfect recipe for life cement!!!
I know fear is making inroads into my mind and my life when it feels like I’m “moving through jello”. It’s that damned life cement starting to set up around me. When that happens, I get to dig in and find out where the fear has taken root… AGAIN!!! At least I’ve gotten better at recognizing the symptoms… one of the many benefits of getting older AND wiser!
Caity,
Wow what an example you are to everyone! I got goose bumps when I read your comment. I love the way you picked yourself up after slithering the wrong way. And New Zealand…now I’m getting a tad envious. No extremely happy for you!
You and your new hubby will be a blessing to the country:)
Davina,
You’re in a great space. In fact while the world drowns in fear you’re on the cutting edge living without it. If you want a new relationship now is the time to go for it. There is no fear to block you.
Megan,
You’re right you will always be provided for. And that’s a super thing to remember when those old thoughts pop up. About those snakes…one thing you can do is NLP. You may want to check into that. I think if that’s the only fear (it’s irrational) you’re doing incredibly well!
Kath,
I understand the fear and control thing. Life cement is a strong visual. It sounds like you’ve come a long way and I know you’re children are blessed to have a mom like you. You’ll find your way no matter what because you like me are wiser and older. Except I think I’m older than you!!
Oh, Tess!
Just reading the post title gave me such comfort and courage! Thank you for this…it matches my moment of validation to move forward!
“Fearlessness should be our greatest offense not defense!” ~Henie~
I have fears of being inadequate. There are so many things I would love to do but think “there is no way” I don’t have the training…or the experience. And mostly I think…there is way too much competition! I would love to do something more with my photography…but I can’t get over those hurdles…
Hi Peggy and Tess .. obviously a thought provoking post .. I’m not in a position where I can consider those – as I devote my main time to my mother and uncle .. but I can see where you’re coming from and your other readers are able to take things on board .. one day I will be there .. and am sure I won’t be daunted with the future .. it just needs to wait with me for a little while ..
Thanks Tess .. you too have suffered from loss recently .. it’s good to have you around ..
Thanks – Hilary Melton-Butcher
Positive Letters
Hi Tess,
I choose to embrace the fear, and move beyond it (it’s so easy to say…and yet so hard to do…). So, maybe the correct answer is: I’ll have days where I do well at this, and I know there’ll also be days that are much more of a struggle to really embrace that fear. And I’ll be okay with that. As long as I know that deep down, I am moving in the directions my heart shouts out (or is it a whisper sometimes?). Maybe part of this all is listening … for those whispers. And then embracing them as part of me. And maybe, just maybe, this will make facing those fears a bit easier, knowing without a doubt that I’m listening to my heart in all of it…
What Came to mind was :
False
Evidence
Appearing
Real
I used that with a client yesterday to help her move forward and realised I am moving foward.
I have been fearful about stepping into my own power and showing my true colors to the world.
Like Lance I am now starting to live for Now and that stops fear appearing.
I am so glad I found this blog
Namaste
Suzie
Hennie,
I know I’m on the right path as well if I’m helping you and others move forward. Thanks for validating what I do!
Caroline,
If there’s anything I can do to help let me know. I’m good at brainstorming. When I was first thinking of writing a book I thought why does the world need another book. What is there that hasn’t been said. I’ve gotten so many “thank yous” from people who have read my book I know I did the right thing!
Hillary,
It’s good that you honor where you are today. When you’re ready the opportunities will be there. Thanks for stopping by!
Lance I don’t know which word fits you better…wise or brave? Just know if you need anything on your path I’m here to help! You rock!
Suzie,
Yes let’s shout that to the world from the mountaintops:
False
Evidence
Appearing
Real! Yeah!
Hi Tess. My biggest fear in life has kept me alone and lonely until recently. I had all the classic excuses for not getting involved in a healthy relationship, all the “what if’s?”. The fear of being vulnerable, the fear of being hurt again, the fear of being lost and alone. So what did I do?
I finally faced my fears and took a HUGE risk, and now I’m basking in the land of abundance………free to love, free to express the real me………free to FIND the real me. It is a lovely experience, one that would not have happened except for people like you, Tess, that help me to see that I am a worthy and worthwhile person. For that, I say thank you, thank you, and thank you!
Hi Tess
Great message on this post. Peggy is a very wise woman, thank you for high lighting her here.
If we wish to have courage, we must have to have fear. Fear is what bring up our courage.
Thank you for sharing.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
@Caroline,
If I were you, I’d take Tess up on her offer. She’s a fantastic coach and coaching works. I swear that everyone who’s ever been coached well uses the word “miracle”. If she hadn’t offered, I would have! For example, there’s a photo competition over at a site I visited yesterday with the theme of Beach, and your seagull photos would have stormed through! (Sorry Tess; I enjoy reading comments as well as posts and like you, think Caroline’s work is of a professional standard and exquisite.)
@Tess,
You are so good at finding these wonderful folk. I already know of Peggy, but it’s fantastic to see so much wisdom distilled into two deceptively simple lists like that! (Another one for the Lists I Love button on your nav bar This post is wonderful on so many levels; the first is that it gets the topic of fear out and on the table without all of our stories, dramas and catastrophising so that we can simply sit with them long enough to identify them. Many of us push the fear so deep down it becomes a life of unnamed anxieties and grey, scared days. If we name them and face them, we can develop the mindset and skills we need to tame them.
Thank you!
Janice,
I agree with you on Carolynn’s photography! Sorry to disappoint you on the lists, their Peggy’s! Only the questions are mine. I didn’t mean to mislead anyone! Again if I did I apologize.
Helen,
Wow thanks for the credit! However you’re the one who had to put what you learned from me into action. You’re amazing and I’m so happy for everything wonderful in your life.
Gio,
It’s so true without fear there would be no courage or would there? That’s a great thought to ponder. Thanks for stopping by!
Thank you to both you & Cath for the generous gift! I’m looking forward to it!!
Now…fear….
I’m most afraid of not realizing my deepest, most sacredly held dreams. That I’m not good enough or capable enough of achieving them and that they will forever dance just out of reach like fireflies that are impervious to the ache in my heart.
I’m not sure I do deal with fear. I think I mostly acknowledge its presence like a specter lurking barely visible in the shadows and do my best to press on in spite of the hair raising on the back of my neck.
What I would like others to know about fear is that it an insidious succubus. It will drain every ounce of desire, joy, energy, and enthusiasm out of your life, if you let it, until you’re left sitting like a lump on the couch with nothing more to look forward to than your favourite episode of Dancing With the Stars.
Thank you for this. I needed to turn around and be reminded to look that specter square in the eyes again. It had lulled me into a state of false security…damn it’s sneaky!
Blessings,
Carolynn
Peggy McColl’s books and life choices are inspiring. Thanks for choosing to share these ideas here. You are a blessing in your own ways too!
Carolyn,
What honest, raw and powerful thoughts. Thanks for sharing them with us. Yes continue on the journey with hope in your heart and put the stars in y our eyes and reach! I will send you good thoughts and blessing for your dreams!
Liara,
Thanks I needed to hear that!
Tess
Thanks for this — I haven’t heard of Peggy’s material and I’ll definitely check it out. Personally what I’ve found about fear is that the more intense sensation I bring into my life on a regular basis — usually through yoga and rock climbing — the less that sinking feeling in my chest (which is what fear is for me) is able to shake me.
Hello Tess!
This is a great article. I love the “fear-marker” list. In recent years I realized had to overcome the relationship “fear-marker” or I would never experience a fulfilling relationship. I did just that and amnow in the best relationship of my life!
(sorry I haven’t commented recently, just returned from vacation. I did keep reading your blog via my cell phone!)
Keith,
You’re the best! Who ever you’re in relationship with is one lucky person! I think you’re my most dedicated fan!
Tess,
You have a great blog and it is always useful, challenging and inspirational. When I was just beginning my blog, I would read several blogs to get inspiration. I narrowed that list down to just a handful and The Bold Life is one of those. I love your writing style and I’m excited about the article your writing for me.
Keep up the awesome work!
“Sogreat hasbeen the endurance,so incredible the achivement,that,as long as
the sun keeps a sey course in heaven,it would be foolish to despair of the humanrace”
Ernest L.Woodward
As Above