Guest post from Joanna Warwick
Nothing makes me feel more stuck and frustrated than delays.
Delays don’t have to mean you won’t achieve your goals but, sometimes, to achieve the end goal, you must have a detour, to experience something you need to learn, to help you get where you want to be.
A few months ago I went on a great snowboarding holiday, but when travelling home I got stuck in a series of events that had nothing to do with me, starting with missing the flight.
I just wanted to get home, but instead I had to sit in traffic for hours on a crowded bus, and then wait around for hours for another flight now having to be redirected to Birmingham, then endure a five-hour train journey to where I had originally parked my car, and then a two-hour drive to my home in Cornwall.
My journey went from an easy four hours to a frustrating fourteen hours, and added an extra £350 to my costs.
I could have seen it as my punishment for having a good time – and honestly this is something I may have believed in the past.
Life’s Resilience Tests
Instead, I just saw it as a test of my resilience: how I can cope with life’s winding path and not being in control. Actually, it turned out to be a bit of an adventure as I met some really nice people, was inspired by randomly meeting a very successful creative business entrepreneur, and even met a guy I went on a couple of fun dates with afterwards.
In the end, my travel insurance covered most of my costs and so, overall, I gained more than I lost.
With hindsight, I can make sense of it and know how it panned out – which I couldn’t see when I was in the situation. All I could do then was trust that I would get home eventually.
When it came to launching my new business/ blog site, I was again faced with delays that were out of my hands. Some were due to other people, some due to technical issues, and none were mine to resolve.
The way I coped with it demonstrated how much I have changed. How much more confident, stronger and calmer I am than I used to be. I was able to roll with it, not get stressed out, and let things sort themselves out – and, of course, everything got resolved in time.
These small reminders and tests are all part of a life lesson I’ve had to learn the hard and painful way.
I fell deeply in love nearly four years ago, but deep down I knew I wasn’t ready for what that meant.
My fears made me stubborn, so I tried my hardest to be ready and, the more I pushed to make it happen, the more we couldn’t connect, the further and further apart we became. The more I fought, the worse the situation got, and more painful it became.
The timing just wasn’t right.
I tried really hard to ignore it, because I was scared I would lose out if I didn’t hold on tightly; I was scared I would miss out on love!
It felt as if I was fighting tooth and nail against life and the universe; a mighty heavyweight opponent. I became utterly exhausted, as if I had been paddling upstream, or against the current. When I finally was too tired to fight any more, I gave in and accepted I wasn’t in control.
For a long time I believed it was because I wasn’t good enough and I was making mistakes and this was my punishment. Now, safely out on the other side of the struggle, I know the truth.
My heart’s desire was right; I just wasn’t ready to live it yet…
Gradually my life began to change and I began to see my dreams unfold, one small step at a time. As I grew stronger and more confident, my trust and patience grew also.
My journey since then, as with my whole life, has been full of detours.
Sometimes I didn’t want to take those detours; it felt as if I was being pushed and shoved by a greater force. Oh, how I resisted, and hurt and bruised myself in the process: now, I understand it was all for my own good.
Slowly I began to reconnect with my faith ~ faith in the knowledge that I am loved.
I may not have liked it or enjoyed it, but every push, shove, detour, diversion or delay was a demonstration of tough and soft love by life, the universe, by love itself, to make me ready for my dreams and guide me to my future and all that is waiting for me.
Yes, have dreams and goals, follow your heart, take action where you can, believe and really go for what you want.
When you find that life is getting in your way though, blocking your path, slowing you down or diverting you, remember it is not about rejection, punishment or even abandonment; it is simply life loving you.
Life is trying to guide you.
Yes you are worthy of your dreams and yes you may think you are ready to achieve them. However life knows better and this is life’s way of showing you you’re just not quite ready yet, but you will be…
As every good comic knows timing is everything, but in life we have little control over that. So just find a little faith, let go of your fears and trust that it will all work out in good time, just as it is meant to.
Bio: Jo Warwick is a writer, healer and believer in the magic of life…
Do you want to fall in love with life again? Discover how to bring freedom, fun, excitement, joy and love back into your life. Visit Rediscover the Magic: download for FREE Tess Marshall’s interview part of the guest expert interview collection.
Please share your thoughts!
I’m a lover of detours ever since I discovered that when a detour occurred as I drove I often found myself driving along lovely roads I’d never experienced before and I decided why couldn’t life be like that. Detours taking me to where I was headed, just down a more beautiful path.
Enjoyed reading this Jo and thanks to Tess for sharing you.
Love Elle
xoxo