Change Your Energy, Spiral Upward and Soar: 10 Powerful Tips

downward spiral

"Your way begins at the other side. Become the sky. Take gaze to the prison wall. Escape. Walk out like someone suddenly born into color. Do it now." ~ Rumi  

We all experience days when nothing seems to stop our downward spiral. A couple of weeks ago, I found myself overwhelmed and overreacting to the technical difficulties I was experiencing online. 

I felt frustrated and angry that nothing seemed to be going right. I replayed a negative story in my mind until I couldn’t see straight. Even though I wanted to change my perception, I kept tripping over my own two feet. 

I couldn't seem to escape my downward spiral. 

A few hours later, I shared my frustration with my mastermind group. I was challenged to stop being so negative. I was told it was my limiting beliefs that were holding me back. I was challenged to change them. 

I knew they were right. My irrational beliefs, at the time were: “Technology is too difficult for me to understand. It’s too hard. I’ll never get it.” 

My partners affirmed my brilliance and how far I have come. The affirmation I was given to use when dealing with technology is, “I’ve got this!” 

A few hours later, I got off the pity pot and stopped feeling sorry for myself. My friends were right. Deep down, I didn’t feel capable. They nailed it.

I decided to take the following day off to do some quiet reflection, followed by something fun. 

By the middle of the day, I realized that I had been under a lot of stress recently. My sister has cancer. I recently let go of someone I dearly loved (his presence in my life wasn’t a good thing anymore). My grandson was due to have major surgery on his spine. And the day prior to my meltdown, I discovered a friend had died from complications due to bulimia. And that’s just my personal life!

To say I had a lot going on is an understatement. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of grief and loss. 

Once I put the pieces of the puzzle together, it was easier to forgive myself for my frustration and anger. It was easier to begin to release my old story. 

Because I showed up as my authentic self in my mastermind group, I was given the help I needed in order to turn everything around. It turned out to be a blessing. Being real always has its own rewards, right?

We all have events in life that throw us off track and jolt our emotions. How we handle them determines whether we continue our downward spiral and stay stuck or spiral upwards and soar. 

Tips To Change Your Energy, Spiral Upward and Soar 

1. Connect. The daily moments of connection we experience with others propel us forward in love. In this space we can heal and move forward. 

2. Reflect. Reconnect with yourself to gain insight into what’s going on behind the scenes. Notice what you are feeling and thinking. Be gentle with yourself and honor the space you are in. 

3. Put your own needs first. Stop and take care of yourself. Give yourself time to be. Write in your journal or go for a walk. 

4. Stay open to change. Go with the flow. Don’t fight where you are or what’s happening. Breathe and let yourself ride the wave. Nothing lasts forever. 

5. Pay attention. Write in your journal what you got right and what went right at the end of the day. What you focus on expands. Grow the positive. 

6. Self-generate positive emotions. Don’t rely on others to make you feel better. That’s your responsibility. When you feel good, amazing and delightful things happen in your life. 

7. Change your story. Rewrite your narrative. Give it a positive spin with a happy ending. 

8. Make small changes. Fine tune your energy. Listen to upbeat music. Move. Go for a run. Eat something green. Do what makes you joyful and your energy will follow. 

9. Create positive experiences. Spend time with your friends. Do something adventurous. Have fun. 

10. Engage in a conversation with someone. Rant and rave. Cry. Write in your journal. Let it all out. Just don’t set up camp! Allow yourself to feel what you need to feel and do what you need to do. Then move on. 

When you're open to solutions and expect the best, things get better. You're able to unfurl your brilliance and reach your greatest potential.

How do you stop a downward spiral? 
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  • David Stevens June 30, 2013, 10:32 pm

    Hi TESS,.
    These 10 points all help. You and I get trapped in negative emotions from time to time no matter how brilliant we are in looking at Life in a positive way. Some release mechanisms are needed in these times. … and sharing your ’emotions’ with others certainly gives a much needed source for changing things around.
    Be good to yourself

  • Cathy Taughinbaugh July 1, 2013, 11:51 am

    Hi Tess,

    I can so relate to your downward spiral because of technical issues. I’m having a similar problem. I was so distraught, I burst into tears a few weeks ago, something I have not done since I started my blog. What’s hard for me is that it feels like a foreign language that I obviously don’t know. I also regrouped and just try to breathe and know that it will all get worked out in time. So sorry to hear about your losses and know that I am sending good thoughts and prayers for your grandson!! Best wishes to him with his surgery.

    • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:10 am


      I think the key for us is to stay in the moment with the issue at hand. I future trip by telling myself that this stuff constantly evolves and I’ll never be ahead or feel like I got it. Thanks!

  • Elle July 1, 2013, 1:04 pm

    Tess, I’m reminded of the old saying, before enlightenment chop wood, carry water, after enlightenment chop wood and carry water.

    It happens to all of us, ‘one of those days’, only now it’s about how long we ‘choose’ to stay there.

    I like your ideas for moving beyond…we don’t fall off the path…this is the path and it’s all good. Kudos to you for boldly heading in the direction you wanted to go.


    • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:10 am

      Thanks for your support. Chop wood, carry water. xo

  • Suzie Cheel July 1, 2013, 5:25 pm

    Wow in sync- I lost it last week in a different way although I see we both have partners that see the brilliance in us we often struggle with
    3 and 7 resonated as the biggest challenge areas for me

    I switched off, let go and released stuff that wasn’t serving me
    sending you love and light
    Suzie xxoo

    • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:11 am

      I feel the love and light and sending it right back at you! xo

  • Betsy/Zen Mama July 1, 2013, 7:44 pm

    So sorry you had to go through all this! Hope your grandson’s surgery went well. And that your sister is comfortable. No wonder you felt like you did/do. I love your tips. Always good to read.

    It’s amazing how in hindsight we can look back and pinpoint why we were feeling that way. We have to trust when we’re going through a bad time that we will understand at a later date the reason.

    • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:12 am

      The surgery went so well…a miracle for sure! Thanks for your prayers.

  • Sandra Pawula July 1, 2013, 8:00 pm

    Tess, I’m sure you’re mastermind group was a help, but I personally think you are brilliant for having the courage to take time off, reflect, and see what’s really going on. When we get to our wits end, we need a break. But often we don’t give ourselves this gift. You did! You are so awesome!

    • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:13 am

      When I get in that state, I can’t take the misery so I don’t usually resist what I need. You’re the best!

  • Jodi Chapman July 1, 2013, 9:45 pm

    All I’m going to say is that I love you, you rock, and thank you for walking your talk. You continue to inspire me. XOXO

  • Tess July 2, 2013, 7:13 am


    I’m only reflecting your own light. Thanks for the support. xo

  • Jess July 2, 2013, 7:20 am

    Thanks Tess, some brilliant tips here. I think the one I need to listen to the most is ‘make small changes’…I think I try too much at once and this leaves me overwhelmed.

    • Tess July 2, 2013, 12:34 pm

      Oh yes small is all we need. It all adds up to big!

  • Dena Warfield July 2, 2013, 12:02 pm

    Tess, I’m so sorry for all the problems and glad your grandson’s surgery went well. Thank you for the insight. I like your steps to stop the downward spiral and to look up. I’m reminded of the old saying, “It’s always darkest before the dawn.” Sometimes we are so bogged down with the circumstances of the moment that we can’t see that there is a dawn right behind the darkness.
    I can relate. I’ve worked with computers for years so the technical isn’t usually my problem, it’s trying to figure-out the online presence, marketing, and social media. That’s my nightmare. I have discovered that I need 2 days off per week. The internet will still be there on Monday morning. During those 2 days I take care of me and enjoy time with my husband. We travel, we go to different entertainment venues, and I read novels to give my mind a break.

  • Tess July 2, 2013, 12:36 pm

    The surgery went miraculously well! That’s a good saying for me to remember. Yes the presence, marketing and social media is a whole other story for me. Ha. May as well laugh.Smart for taking weekends off. I take evenings off;))

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