Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out. ~Karl Menninger
~William Allen White
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July 25, 2011, 9:21 am
I deeply… really deeply thank you so much for sharing this. I’m in such a depressed moment in my life now but when I read this… you gave me enlightenment. Your blog is life changing. I hope more people will read this. You are brilliant and most of all wonderful! I want to hear more from you soon. I will surely come back to read this post again and again. If I can memorize the 75, much better! thanks!
Great post, Tess! Everytime I read one of your lists, I immediately know that you are writing from experience. I’ve seen others stop living their lives because of fear and here, you show us how much of it is imagined rather than real and that it is largely a momentary obstacle that we can move around and out of our path.
Thank you for sharing your rich life and wonderful wisdom with us! xx
Great list on how to conquer your fears, Tess! Sometimes we let fear run our life, and I know I need to look at that once in awhile and get a reality check. We can only live for today. Right now is only moment that we have.
It’s been too long since I visited, but I did pick a good day. This was a great post to read. It should be read again and again so you can absorb the wonderful ways to kick the butts of our fears:~)
BTW I would list my favorites, but there are too many:~)
I love #72. Kids do find joy in everything. They help you remember how to value life the simple care free way. This is a great list. Thank you for sharing.
Amazing list you’ve thought up here. What really hit me was, “Take responsibility. Nobody is going to do it for you.”
I feel like I put in some effort and expect results to fill in. When they don’t I blame external circumstances. But I’m starting to grow out of that mindset and be accountable.
You control the results. You want it – go out and get it. Might come off as slightly daunting, but at the same time is is incredibly freeing since you no longer are tied to excuses holding you down!
this is so beautiful and helpful tess! thank you for taking the time to help others. so glad to find you, and this, through ordinary traveler on twitter. i’ll be sharing this and using it as a life checklist! 🙂
Mmmm…outrageous and juicy…I’m in!!!
And what a great list – to start moving beyond those fear that (all too easily) crop up…
Hi Tess, thanks very much for this wonderful post – I’m going to print it out and reread it often – so many great tips for living life to the full! xo
This is fantastic. I love – take a digital break, and hold your own hand. I need both right now. lol
Beautiful and insightful and just a brilliant resource with an awesome photo. I’ve been having a really bad night/morning and this helped me even though you are talking about fears, so thank you dear Tess!
Thank you for this Tess! What a wonderful and wise list. I will be sure to refer to this often!
July 26, 2011, 6:38 am
I LOVE this. It is just what I wrote an article about today that came out on Mamalode.com, called the Fear Factor.
I let fear control my life for years. I finally found some of the tips you listed here on my own long journey, and my life has never been the same.
This is such a wonderful list to keep handy. I am going to print it out. Thankyou thankyou! I am so happy to reconnect with your blog, and I’m looking forward to sharing my new site with everyone soon!
Jen (Formerly Life’s Little Lessons Under the Big Sky)
This is a post to return to over and over. There is so much wisdom here.
I especially love that you are such a straight shooter, telling people to not give unsolicited advice, to ask questions and ask for help. Following just a few of your points can change everything.
I came across your post on running over on Leo’s site, and I’ve been hooked ever since.
This is a great list that will be duly bookmarked. I particularly like #44, and how you haven’t forgotten about the elderly.
You are such an inspiration.
Amazing list of tips for overcoming fear, Tess!
I tend to confront my fears head-on. I used to fear shots, so I forced myself to watch as I got stuck. I focused on the pain and asked myself if it was as bad as imagined. It never was.
Basically did the same thing with childhood shyness and fear of heights.
It’s amazing how able we are of we confront what we fear. You are so right that what is feared is almost never as bad as we think it will be.
Awesome post, Tess. Loved every word!
Such an incredible list!!! Thank you for sharing!!
July 26, 2011, 11:26 am
Ok Tess…since my birthday is Halloween…I am going to pick number: ! 13 !
13. Seize the opportunity in front of you, or someone else will.
To me this action can be motivated by “fear”.
Just look what helped fuel the sub-prime realstate market that went kaplunk.
The mentality was ‘I better up the offer and make this happen, or I will never get another chance.’
I have found that the times in my life when I have been the most happy have been when I did not possess the bright shiny objects that everyone else wanted.
I found this short little poem that kind of relates…
Ed was in love with a cocktail waitress,
but Ed’s family, and his friends,
didn’t approve. So he broke it off.
He married a respectable woman
who played the piano. She played well enough
to have been a professional.
Ed’s wife left him…
Years later, at a family gathering
Ed got drunk and made a fool of himself.
He said, “I should have married Doreen.”
“Well,” they said, why didn’t you?”
Thank you Tess
July 26, 2011, 11:37 am
“58. Don’t give unasked for advice. It’s verbal abuse.”
Looks like Ed should not of listened to his family and friends…
A great list Tess. A few I have already done and the rest should be stuck on the fridge and revisited. (Is it me or is 41 a bit askew?)
You know already how much I love your list…from one list maker to another 🙂
I love #2…and in my life, I’ve replaced the word “wrong” with “when things don’t go according to plan…”
My own plan didn’t pan out. It doesn’t mean my idea isn’t useful – it still is. I’ve just come to the conclusion it’s not where my passionate energy wants to be. So…I’ve taken a break and I’m creating a new plan, a new idea, but always I’m drawn back to where I started.
This time I’m determined “no more distractions!”
You’ve done it again. Great list that will be kept near and dear for time to come. Thanks.
Beautiful post Tess! I’ll have to print this out! I totally agree with the Ghandi that fear is the enemy. Fear is what usually brings on hate!
These are some great points in what you have mentioned here! The one that some people have gotten mixed up is about focusing on your own needs first! Too, that fear is a great emeny that holds a lot of people back!
July 27, 2011, 5:43 am
You know how much I love your lists, Tess! 75 awesome tips on living a less fearful life — so many stood out to me, but this one, my friend, rings true: “Surround yourself with people who love you back.”
When I’m feeling my most vulnerable or need encouragement, I need only look beyond the tip of my nose because standing there, waiting to love and support me, are dozens of true-blue friends & people who love me. I am a love-magnet, and as a result I am surrounded by the very best people who help me when I need it most.
I am able to live more BOLDLY because of people like YOU, Tess Marshall, and I’m so grateful for our good connection.
Loving you lots!
Loving this post lots, too!
July 27, 2011, 7:50 am
First time! such a in credible list i don’t really know where to start it was very true…thanks for sharing.
Tess, you’ve excelled here major time. I got to No.25 before stopping to take them in because that’s what you have to do there’s so much truth and depth you’ve included. You have uncovered and discovered oracle type insight and I hope it touches people’s lives in only the most positive of ways. And what would I do without fear? Starting a new life like I am now without a plan or purpose except to be me! Let’s see where it takes me and what encounters come my way. Bliss you!
Many of is live in fear which only exists in the mind. There is no fear in the real world. We can’t go out and dig up fear and place it in a bucket.
It’s like the people who fear for months going to the dentists office and once they go and the dentist says that all is well, they spent months worrying for nothing.
July 27, 2011, 10:38 pm
Enjoyed reading your post Tess. Your take on “Fear” i.e. the negative energy have so nicely been elaborated. Great learning for me & my community….Thanks.
July 27, 2011, 11:21 pm
WOW! What a list. Helpful? Beyond words. I may just read this every day. Thank you!!
Hi Tess! Great tips I agree with most of them! Thanks a million! Printed and attached to the wall 🙂
July 28, 2011, 7:46 am
You seriously have made my day! Thank you for all the inspirational and full of wisdom listings! I could not help it, I just felt like I needed to share your generosity of posting this. I just had to print it and share it with colleagues and would re-post this with credits to your link. Thank you! Bless you!
This is a great list to live a fearless life! I learned years ago that fear is behind most of my reactions, and I choose to act instead of react in my life as much as possible. I choose to live a life of joy and peace and all the ideas on your list are part of that life.
Thanks Tess for the great tips~ (awesome!) It’s so hard to pick a favorite one because I love them all. I think applying these steps will not only reduce/eliminate fear but they bring joy and happiness to life too. Keep it coming, Tess 🙂
What an amazing list! I like getting enough sleep. 🙂 But holding my own hand and soothing myself is good too.
I’ve been thinking quite a bit about the idea and word “illusion.” What does it really mean. Often, when you are in the grips of fear it’s very difficult to understand or believe this. It seems so real. You’ve said it many different ways in this post and my feeling is that the key to love and accept yourself regardless of having fear.
August 3, 2011, 8:41 pm
Love it, makes me feel good to feel good!
October 20, 2011, 12:40 am
Thank U very Much For This Very Truth Lines about life
I’m so glad I stumbled across your blog. I love this list – I particularly like the quotes that help you along as you’re reading it (also because I’m a sucker for a great quote).
thanks for sharing,
Whenever I feel especially fearful of something, I like to write a letter to myself in which I envision/write about the scary thing (whatever it is) happening in the best way possible. I do not worry about what ifs, or whether my vision is actually practical or not. It gets me excited about the great possibilities that could sprout from what I am afraid of.
In the end of ends though… what is the worst that can happen? In most cases, nothing that isn’t fixable.
Thanks for writing!
What a wonderful post! I’d love to repost this article on my website http://www.cycleharmony.com, with your permission of course. I think it’ll benefit my community greatly. Let me know.
April 19, 2012, 6:49 am
Loved the thoughts, but please proofread. Mistakes, and there are several, detract from your message. Don’t settle for mediocre, or, as you put it, don’t settle fro mediocre.
This is such a cool post! I can’t believe you came up with 75 (great) steps. I read through them all, and I especially like the “be honest” step. It’s so important to be honest with yourself. If you’re afraid, hiding from the fact will only make it worse.