What Really Matters?

by Tess on August 27, 2009

cup of love II
Creative Commons License photo credit: rebecca-jaclynne

“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.” Friedrich Nietzsche

We don’t have to be wealthy, educated, or important people to make a significant difference in the world. We’ve all effected more people and  have done more good than we realize because we are all connected.

It doesn’t matter

It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks

It doesn’t matter that my car is 10 years old

It doesn’t matter I gained five pounds

It doesn’t matter that I eat breakfast for dinner

It doesn’t matter if I have a bad hair day

It doesn’t matter that you forgot my birthday

It doesn’t matter that I came in last

It doesn’t matter what someone thinks of my family

It doesn’t matter if I leave dishes in the sink at night

It doesn’t matter how much money we haveIt doesn’t matter that I’m short and your tall


It doesn’t matter the color of your skin

It doesn’t matter I made a mistake

It doesn’t matter what I did in my past

It doesn’t matter if you have the last word

It doesn’t matter if I don’t get my way

It doesn’t matter if you disagree with me

It matters…

It matters that I practice what I preach

It matters that I kissed him goodbye

It matters that I have compassion

It matters that I spoke kind words

It matters that I made someone smileIt matters that I spend time with family


It matters that I love my friends

It matters that I’m here to listen

It matters that I’m here to help

It matters that I forgive and forgetIt matters that I am a happy person


It matters how I spend my money

It matters how I treat the earth

It matters that I am healthy and happy

It matters that I’m willing to give

It matters that I do what I enjoy

It matters that I see good in everyone

It matters that I spend time in nature

It matters how I spend my time

It matters how I spend my energy

It matters that I have integrity

It matters all the people I touch on my way

It matters that I care deeply

It matters that I want to make the world a better place

It matters that I want to make a difference

What matters most is love

Just a very simple two-word question —”What matters?”—can change your path in life and effect the lives of people around you.

What’s important to you? What really matters to you?
Do you live deliberately according to the things that are important to you?

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    { 42 comments… read them below or add one }

    Jill August 27, 2009 at 9:38 pm

    What an inspiring post. What matters? I used to struggle to answer questions like that. I would generally give the answer that I thought would sound the best. Today my honest answer is… Me. More specifically, me living my truth. If I can live my truth my spirit shines. I can be a free-spirited woman. That’s what matters to me. Just my thoughts.


    Daphne @ Joyful Days August 27, 2009 at 10:07 pm


    Your post reminded me of a book by Hyrum Smith – What Matters Most. It’s so true that once we know what matters, life becomes simple and joyful. Right now what matters most for me on a daily basis:

    - Something to do
    - Somewhere to be
    - Someone to love


    Wilma Ham August 27, 2009 at 10:09 pm

    What matters? Great question to ask before you do anything and oh Jill, I love that you now matter and I think I take that on board too. I am the why of my life, that I am love and love in action is actually all that matters.
    Love colors my life, it flavors what I eat, what I see and what I do.
    Without love nothing seems to matter much.
    So I make sure I make my heart strong and get access to the love that is in me. That matters. So, yes Jess, loves matters for me too, a lot.
    What else is there actually in life worth pursuing?


    Wilma Ham August 27, 2009 at 10:11 pm

    I meant Tess of course, however mistakes do not matter, what matters is that I know you are a wonderful writer and that you are Tess.


    Caroline August 27, 2009 at 10:42 pm

    WOW! This just put everything in perspective.

    It doesn’t matter what size I am, but it matters how I treat my body. It doesn’t matter if I sell my art, but it matters how much joy it brings me to create.

    Thank you Tess!


    CherylK August 28, 2009 at 3:05 am

    I’m with Caroline…couldn’t have said it better. It’s all about perspective and living with gusto.


    Ann-Marie Fagan August 28, 2009 at 3:06 am

    Hi Tess, this is a very timely post for me. Thank You.
    I’m going to visit my family in Ireland in 8 days time. It’s my 6th visit in 9 years and this trip has a completely different feel about it. In the past I’d go on a crash diet, get a new wardrobe and buy presents for practically everyone I know, stressing the bank balance in the process.
    This time round I haven’t done any of the above as all this looking good stuff does not matter anymore, not one bit.
    So what does matter right now in my life?
    That I’m relaxed and so looking forward to hanging out with my family; spending time with my parents, playing with my niece and nephews and having fun with my siblings. I am so clear on what this trip is about. LOVE.
    Enjoying myself, being present with my family, expressing my love for them and making every moment count. Bring it on.
    Thank You Tess for asking such brilliant questions.


    Jay Schryer August 28, 2009 at 5:04 am

    This is really beautiful, powerful, and inspiring. Thank you so much for writing this, and sharing it with us!


    Lance August 28, 2009 at 9:34 am

    This is beautifully written and expressed. It matters to me that I’m here today reading this…knowing that these words are spoken from your heart. You matter…and that matters to me.


    Keith August 28, 2009 at 9:47 am

    I really like this Tess! I just love it when you read things that make you think, examine and put into perspecive. You achieved all of that with this post!

    What matters to me is that every day , the people that I love know it. It matters that every day I am encouraging to the people I come into conatct with, in person or otherwise.

    Thanks Tess!


    Michelle August 28, 2009 at 10:39 am

    Beautiful! I will save this and read it often.

    The one that stood out for me was, “It doesn’t matter that you forgot my birthday.” Mine was last week and a close friend didn’t call, and still hasn’t realized he missed it. I’m having a hard time letting go of that. But yes, in the long run of a 15-year relationship, it’s one day, and it doesn’t really matter.


    Joy August 28, 2009 at 10:49 am

    Thank you–these words and sentiments are exactly what I needed today. Vey inspirational!

    Today what matters is not that I was flexed off work and feel a bit of panic at what I don’t have, but that the sun rose and is shining brilliantly (doesn’t always happen in the harbor during this season!), and that I am about to experience a rare treat and spend a very fun evening with my son at an amusement park. What matters is that the day is good and I am fully in it.


    jonathanfigaro August 28, 2009 at 10:55 am

    What truly matters is the ability to think positive and pursue a life of purpose. Without a purpose in life you will become a wandering generality instead of a meaningful specific. Your ability to understanfd how to think positive is essential to becoming a a great person.

    Here are a few more things that Matter
    1. Taking care of the kids today while my wife has a day off
    2. Remembering my Mothers birthday
    3. Having a healthy body
    4. Working towards your Dreams daily
    5. Giving when you can


    Sara B. Healy August 28, 2009 at 1:19 pm


    What a beautiful post!!! Here are a few things that matters to me:

    1)I give something to people I meet that might help them and I do it without expecting something back.
    2) I write from my heart and listen to Izzy.
    3) I work hard to see the positive side of life
    4) I can laugh and share laughter with others.

    I also want you to know that I got your book, “Flying by the Seat of My Soul,” and I love it. I’m still reading it. Today, I just turned to a page and looked at the first words that caught my eye. They were perfect for me. Here they are: “I believe that all the lessons I have learned from my past struggles and tumultuous times have given me the strength and courage I have today.”

    So TRUE…thanks for this book. I would recommend it to anyone:~)


    Mark August 28, 2009 at 1:21 pm

    Great list! Yes, I do live on purpose, I do live a blessed and wonderful life filled with all that matters. I strive for the wisdom to discern what does and does not matter along my journey.


    Caity August 28, 2009 at 3:26 pm

    Oh what a fantastic post. You really do inspire me to think and challenge myself to think about the things that really matter. To me, it matters that I stand up for what I believe in, I spread joy to others, and I am able to love myself.


    Positively Present August 28, 2009 at 3:59 pm

    Wow, Tess, this is really great. You’ve made such a statement with this post and I love it. You’ve reminded me of what really does matter — and what doesn’t. Thank you for posting this!


    Avani Mehta August 28, 2009 at 10:54 pm

    Ah! this is diving deep right into the heart of matters. If only we ask ourselves this every time we have some choice to make, life would be so much better.


    Hilary August 29, 2009 at 12:53 am

    Hi Tess .. Life matters, life is important – it’s the only one we have; today is the only today we have; count our blessings; live happily; be peaceful even with all the turmoil going on around;

    Savour all moments of bliss – moments matter ..

    Thanks Tess – love is all ..
    Hilary Melton-Butcher
    Positive Letters Inspirational Stories


    Vincent August 29, 2009 at 1:20 am

    Hi Tess,

    What matters. This are the 2 important words that we should ask ourselves daily to help us make our decisions. I believe there are too many times where we spend too much time on things that don’t matter. Imagine how much difference it would make to our life if we are doing things that matter everyday?



    Karen Chaffee August 29, 2009 at 5:00 am

    What an inspiring post, Tess. It really puts things in perspective.

    People matter more than things.

    Having enough matters far more than trying to have everything or even an excess.

    Being kind matters more than having to be right all the time.

    And as you said, Love matters most of all.


    Zeenat(Positive Provocations} August 29, 2009 at 5:18 am

    Hi Tess,
    An incredible post indeed.
    What matters???
    Love love and love matters most. Love in everyone, love in everything and most of all Love in you.
    Thank you for this beautiful post.


    Stacey Shipman August 29, 2009 at 9:05 am

    people matter most. my family. they have always been first on my list, no matter what.


    Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord August 29, 2009 at 9:10 am

    Ohhh, I love your lists, Tess! What matters to me is everything you wrote about, for sure, and gosh, I couldn’t agree more about the money thing. It’s not how much we have, but maybe how we spend it — or how we let it define or rule us (or hopefully NOT define or rule us).

    I think I may send a link to this post to a few friends. It’s just so good!


    Jannie Funster August 29, 2009 at 10:23 am

    What a touching and beautiful post Tess, not sure if I can add much.

    Maybe it matters that I tuck her in each night and sing a lullaby. It matters that I hug a tree each day, really send my love energy to its very core. It matters that I keep reading your blog.


    Harold August 29, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    My first time here and I am glad that I came, this list is very timely as I am at a crossroads professionally and thinking about what matter is what I have been doing alot of lately. The list made me reflect on what does matter. Thank you


    Tess August 30, 2009 at 5:33 am

    Me and living my truth! Well that couldn’t be said any better.

    I never heard of the book but it sounds good to me. I love what matters to you…me as well and you Daphne…You!

    Like you if I’m not filling my day with love I’m wasting my precious time on earth and everyone elses! Yeah for us.

    I love your art and it matters to me as well!

    Cheryl K.
    I love “living with gusto.”

    I used to do those very same things prior to believing in myself. Probably most women in America have as well. Then we become wise and realize “We Are Enough.”

    You betcha! Thanks for stopping by.

    The feeling is mutual. Thanks for all the help and inspiration you bring to us bloggers and readers.

    Encouragement and love…can we all be so wise?!?

    What a good way to look at it. One day in 15 years is easy to forgive when we keep our ego out of it. Next year give him/her a reminder and a big hint!

    I wish you the best with your new job search and you’re so smart to go to the amusement park and have fun with your son. What a reward for a job well done.
    It’s especialy important to reward yourself when times are tough.
    You’re such a great guy and what a wonderful family you must have. Keep on keepin on.

    I’m so glad we found each other’s blog and I love that you love my book. Yeah! And thanks for reading it and mentioning it.

    You are an example to us all. The people around you and the people who read your blog have the privledge to know you.

    You just gave us three lines to live by. You rock!

    Yes, Yes Yes! Thanks for stopping by:)

    So the question would be The choice that matters is___________? Yes!

    Yes savor bliss, moments, family, friends, love…life. It doesn’t get much better than that.

    Good point…it’s one thing to know what matters and another to put it in practice. Our world would be a different place if we all did this.

    Yes being kind trumps being right anyday. Things have no real value. Love lasts beyond ourselves.

    We’re on the same path. Love to you and your place in the world.
    I can’t agree more. Family. Enough said.

    Thanks so much for the compliment and adding what matters to you. You are important to me and I’m blessed with our connection.

    You’re the best mom and I’ love trees. Always have always will. Don’t get why there aren’t more tree houses and kids playing in them. Yeah for our blogs!

    I’m glad I could be of help. A crossroad professionaly can be confusing and stressful. I wish you well on your path. Follow your heart and all will be well.


    Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker August 30, 2009 at 2:22 pm

    Tess, each of those statements can have such a powerful effect upon your life. Thanks for sharing them.


    John August 30, 2009 at 4:47 pm

    What matters to me is the people I inspire everyday, the choices I make to inch closer to my ultimate goals, and life’s trials and tribulations that drive people to share their experiences and know that they are not alone.

    All of the people you’ve befriended (both on and offline) resonate with you. They push you to succeed and motivate you to go even further. All of us here are with you, Tess. This relationship all of us have built together – tribes, communities, groups, forums – this is what matters.


    Hilda August 31, 2009 at 8:37 am

    Wow, Tess, this post is really powerful! Two simple words with a question mark after them could make a huge difference to how we all live our lives if we remembered to ask ourselves this regularly enough.

    I have a few simple ideas stuck inside my front door to remind me to be mindful of how I go about my day. This question is about to join them… Thanks so much!


    Peggy August 31, 2009 at 10:00 am

    What’s really important to me: Making a difference in the lives of others.

    What really matters to me: Integrity. Commitment to Excellence. To Always Do MY Best. (Not be *the* best but be MY best). To be a better person today than I was yesterday. To wake up at 5:45AM just so I can have a cup of coffee with my husband. I love that 30 minutes we get together in the stillness of morning before the business of the day begins.

    Tess – I got your book and that fabulous PINK princess wand – it’s a big hit in my home and it brings SMILES to all who hold it, wave it, and press the magic button. Can you please email me your address – I tossed the box before writing it down.

    I heart you!


    Jodi at Joy Discovered August 31, 2009 at 10:40 am

    Hi Tess!
    Great list!!! I really like how you started the list with what doesn’t matter (all of them are so true!) and ended the list with everything that does matter. I felt my heart swell as I read the ‘what matters’ portion. I’ll have to write my own. What a great exercise!


    She-Fit August 31, 2009 at 7:11 pm

    WOW! What an inspirational post. Why is it that we always focus in on what doesn’t matter. What would the world be like if we all lived life for what truely mattered and forgot about what doesn’t matter


    Paul Maurice Martin August 31, 2009 at 7:41 pm

    It matters that the soul of my soul, so to speak, is peaceful. My best guess is that this is true for everyone but it becomes especially clear when your body is literally falling apart and you stay sane and strong inside. After sixteen years of physical degeneration. Health and wellness are more on the inside than the outside.


    Giovanna Garcia August 31, 2009 at 10:42 pm

    It matters that I live with integrity and treat everyone the same way I wish to be treated.
    I think everything else will fall into place. :-)
    Thanks for a great read.
    Giovanna Garcia
    Imperfect Action is better than No Action


    Robin September 1, 2009 at 12:57 am

    It matters that I follow my heart.

    Thanks for this Tess! – Robin


    Liara Covert September 1, 2009 at 7:01 am

    Friendly reminders like these gently encourage people to choose to listen more to their intuition, that inner loving voice with your best interst in tow


    Tess The Bold Life September 1, 2009 at 11:03 am

    It’s amazing what we can soak up if when we want to! Here’s to the difference they’re making! Thanks for stopping by.

    I agree our community online is a wonderful thing and it’s matters very much to me as well. Thanks for being you and being part of it all. I’m happy our paths crossed.

    Thanks for thinking what I write is good enought to post on your door. I appreciate your kindness and am happy you stopped by.

    I like the way you put not to be “the” best but to be “my” best. That’s great for me too!
    I’m so happy you liked your package and all are having fun. Isn’t life grand?

    I’m happy to inspire you and your own list. It’s such a great little exercise to put things into prespective now and then.

    I think we’re moving closer to the place of all of us living what really matters. In these economic times it kind of rises to the surface.

    I respect and honor your experience. If there is any way I can help you stay strong on the inside let me know.

    Yes it does matter and you’re a shining example for all. I love your blog and isnpiring stories.

    It can’t get any better than that!

    Someday I hope to be at a place where I don’t need reminders!


    Omar September 3, 2009 at 10:36 pm

    What matters to me? Time, friends, goals, family, happiness and peace.


    janice September 15, 2009 at 4:05 am

    Another great Tess list! What matters? Love. Creativity. Living the questions.


    Easels February 13, 2010 at 12:52 am

    great post…..my heart follow you…..keep up


    Debbie February 16, 2010 at 4:58 pm

    This is really great Tess. If everyone stopped to think of what really mattered we would have many more happy people in this world.
    What matters it what makes people happy, but they get so caught up in other things that they forget what really matter.
    Thanks for reminding everyone.
    Debbie´s last post…Is Your Child Emotionally Happy? My ComLuv Profile


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