Do you find yourself thinking, "If I could have a best selling book, a hot product, a household name or my dream job I'll always be happy?"
Most of us know happiness is an inside job and requires living one day at a time. Yet how many of us actually live what we know?
When it comes to my blog I often find myself wishing I had more…more readers, more links, more status, more connections…more, more, more! I can get so caught up in it.
I want to eventually generate income with my blog and in order to succeed I do need more links, connections, status, etc. I also need to live and breathe social media and SEO. The list is endless…
The problem is when I have 10,000 readers I'll want 20,000. As I network and make important connections I'll continue to want and need more. As I learn more technology there will always be the need to know more.
Not all bloggers want all of these things all the time, yet the vast majority of bloggers dream about increasing their popularity, connections, statistics and income, daily.
And no matter how much we achieve we will still want more!
Just when I seem to reach one goal my ego moves the line and tempts me with competition and comparison. My ego seduces me into the desire to be acknowledged, be liked–setting me apart in some way so I appear unique or special. Isn't this what we also believe it takes to succeed online?
When fear and doubt creep it's easy to get lost in the need to do, be and have more. And when I do I lose living in the precious present.
I don't want a life of hoping and striving, obsessed with competition, comparison, tomorrow and yesterday all the while missing "now."
I want to live in joy and wonder.
That's why when daughter no. 4 called inviting us to meet her in San Diego to watch her and her boyfriend run a marathon I said, "Yes!"
That's why when daughter no.2 called and asked me to come to Michigan to stay with my grandson for a couple of days while she traveled I said, "Yes."
That's why I continued on to our cottage in Northern Michigan for a few days of "alone time."
That's why I also took time to visit daughter no.1 and my aging mother before returning home.
And that's why my Alexa ratings are in a downward spiral. And that's why my ego is out in full force whispering, "You're going to fail."
Our blogging desires are insatiable.
There fore I set priorities. I can be happy with what I have and set and accomplish goals.
I won't give up family time, friends or healthy habits. I won't give up wonder and joy and I won't give up happiness today for success tomorrow. It's a personal choice.
What is the value of a grandchild's giggle, watching the sunset, a morning run, a partner's presence, an act of kindness? I value these things because they persistently give my life meaning.
Once we get this it's easier to take control over our lives.
As I continue to pursue success in the blogging world I we can commit to not losing my ability to deeply enjoy small, ordinary pleasures.
I can deeply appreciate my ordinary existence. I can stay present with feelings of anxiety and stress as they arise. I can breathe through them.
Become aware of how many times in one day you wish for a better and bigger blog and all that goes with it?
Now estimate how many times a day you say to yourself,"My life is great just the way it is today!"
My ego seduces me, promising me "my day will come."
My day won't come. Today is "my day." In this moment life is good. In this moment I am at peace. In this moment I have all that I need.
I fill my days with gratitude, awareness and compassion. As I continue to pursue my goals I remind myself in this moment all is well.
The following are 5 ways fear steals your joy and what action you can take in order to enjoy life and the blogging process.
1. You obsess about the competition. Instead of focusing on your most important tasks you worry about what others are doing, who has a higher Google ranking, new product or better affiliates. You feel overwhelmed and anxious.
Take Action: Accept your precious life as it is today both on and off line. When you know more you'll grow more. List your most important task today. Finish it and move on to the next. It's that simple.
Focus on the present moment. You'll always have easy days and days of struggle. Find meaning in both.
2. Your content Lacks pizzazz. Fear blocks creativity and lack of creativity equals boring content.
Take Action: Get away from your computer and visit the zoo, museum, or attend a sporting event. Pay attention to the people, colors and nature. Eat different foods, listen to a variety of music. You'll feel refreshed and your writing will be juicier.
3. You Doubt Yourself. You fear your on the wrong track. You compare your writing to others and see yourself as "the loser."
Take Action: You can choose to recreate yourself daily. Focus on small successes. Learn to trust the process of life. Create affirmations and use them when doubt creeps in.
Thomas Holdcroft said, "Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us."
4. You're unmotivated and stuck. There are ups and downs in blogging. There are times writing feels like a chore.
Tell on yourself. Use examples and stories from your personal experiences. Get support by reaching out to other bloggers. Create a plan for your blog and stick with it. Hire a coach.
5. You want to give up and quit. You feel it's too hard, you're burned out and out of good ideas.
Check in with yourself and acknowledge how you feel emotionally, and physically. Decide what you need to feel better.
Take a creative writing class. Invite a friend to be a guest blogger. Go to the library and look at magazines. Notice hot trends. How can you use them to make your blog sparkle?
Have compassion for yourself. Honor each stage of your blogging journey. Reach out and connect with our blogging community. Create joint ventures, brainstorm ideas and take well needed and deserving breaks.
My ego wants me to spend my days striving for more prosperity, admiration and love. I refuse to postpone enjoying my ordinary life until my blog is top ranked,I am more successful and secure, or more admired and loved.
It's impossible to live in the precious present if I don't have enough today. It's impossible to be content with what I have if I feel I am in a competition and constantly compare myself to other bloggers. Stress and anxiety are toxic to my mind, body and soul.
Today is my day.
I won't miss a precious moment.
"The roses under my window make no reference to former roses or better ones; they are what they are,they exist with God today. There is not time to them. There is simply the rose; it is perfect in every moment of it's existence." R.W.Emerson
Links to Bloggers I Love and Respect
Karl from Work Happy Now writes about How to Discover Your Career Bliss
Evita from Evolving Beings 7 Things I Wish I Had Known Earlier In My Life
Lance from Feel Good Jungle on Don't Give Up
Stacey from Stacey Shipman 5 Ways to Feel Good About the Food You Eat
Katie from The Levity Project Smile: A Micromovent
Steve Aitchison's got a new product Alter Your Jacket
Henrik from the Positivity Blog: The Power of Positivity
How do you balance living for today and planning for tomorrow?