Permission to Be Selfish This Holiday Season

         
Instead of focusing on what you can purchase for others this year I invite you to think about how you can gift yourself. These type of gifts do not cost money. These gifts will enhance your personal self care. They will also bless the people around you; your family, friends, and coworkers. 

If you begin today you will have a holiday glow that will last throughout the year. The only cost is your willingness and commitment. Give generously!

The Gift of Time

Schedule a chunk of time for self-reflection everyday. Make conscious choices. Decide what kind of day you want to have and take the necessary action to obtain it. If you want to be happy, create happiness. If you want to be peaceful, create peace. If you want to be prosperous, create prosperity. Make every choice count.

The Gift of Subtraction

Eliminate excess. What unnecessary repetitive thoughts and stories do you tell yourself? Popular stories these days are about the pain of the past or the fear of the future. Let go of your fears and hang-ups. Forgive yourself and others. Delete what no longer serves you.

The Gift of Unconditional Acceptance

Imagine letting go of the need to compare yourself to others. Know that you are a unrepeatable and irreplaceable human being. Be gentle with yourself. Learn to “be here now” and grow forward.

The Gift of Ordinary

The preciousness of life can often be found in ordinary moments and activities. Too often we are tempted to be more, do more, and know more. Be aware of the beauty in a simple hug, a loving conversation, or breathe of fresh air. Learn to want what you have.

The Gift of Honesty

What do you misrepresent? Refuse to stretch the truth or tell a white lie. There is no such thing as a well-intentioned half truth. It’s easy to justify behavior (think taxes). When you have nothing to hide, inner peace is easily acquired.  

The Gift of Courage

Act in accordance with your beliefs. Be who you are. Speak your truth. Listen to the truth of others. Know that others have the right to act different and be different from you. Be brave and keep moving forward.

To Inspire You:

The Gift of Time

The Gift of Subtraction

The Gift of Unconditional Acceptance

The Gift of Ordinary

The Gift of Courage

The Gift of Honesty 

Let the gift giving begin!

{ 16 comments… add one }

  • Tonya November 7, 2011, 8:21 am

    I love this! :)

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:27 am

      Tonya,
      Thanks for your compliment and taking the time to stop by. I appreciate you,

      Reply
  • Ellie Di November 7, 2011, 11:44 am

    I love that this definition of “selfish” is becoming more wide-spread. Watching out for our energy so that we can better connect with others is absolutely selfish, meaning it’s caring for our Self. The more selfish people (not self-centred, that’s something totally gross and negative) we have in the world, the better a place it will be.

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:28 am

      Ellie,
      Yes recognizing that in order to improve the world you have to improve yourself is one thing we can all do. Congrats on your new book.

      Reply
  • Dave November 7, 2011, 5:15 pm

    What a beautiful gift list. I particularly love the gift of Ordinary, and the gift of Subtraction–your description makes it sound like an appealing way to clear the heart and mind.

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:30 am

      Dave,
      I thought I’d add a twist to that concept. It’s usually used with creating a more simpler life. Thanks for sharing with us.

      Reply
  • Patricia of Patricias Wisdom November 7, 2011, 7:07 pm

    I enjoyed reading all your wise words and ideas and then links you shared here
    We are not giving presents this year, again, and rather we are each spending one on one time with each other and having deeper conversations….I am writing each daughter a letter to deepen the conversation and make sure those words are shared that are important to me. Heart and head connections – they do take time, but the best gifts of all.
    Thank you for sharing

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:31 am

      How wonderful…letters to your daughters. You are wise to know and share your thoughts on the power of more love and less stuff.

      Reply
  • Alex Blackwell | The BridgeMaker November 8, 2011, 4:41 am

    Tess,

    A little self-care is the right gift and and at the right time for me. Thanks for reminding me to give myself permission to do this!

    Alex

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:33 am

      Alex,
      I’m happy to see you’re taking good care of yourself during this difficult time. Love you and remember this too shall pass.

      Reply
  • Cathy Taughinbaugh | Treatment Talk November 8, 2011, 4:18 pm

    Hi Tess,

    Love the post. Remembering ourselves is a wonderful gift to give. Particularly like The Gift of Time. Having time for self-reflection is indeed a gift. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
    • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:34 am

      Cathy,
      When I skip my time of self-reflection I’m in trouble with myself and those around me;)

      Reply
  • Justin | Personal Growth November 8, 2011, 8:34 pm

    Here Here Tess. :) I am all about it and count me in. It’s all about simplicity and letting go of those things that no longer serves us.

    Reply
  • Tess November 9, 2011, 5:35 am

    Justin,

    Letting go of what doesn’t serve us sounds simple but takes courage. Thanks for joining in and telling us about it.

    Reply
  • Betsy at Zen Mama November 10, 2011, 6:28 pm

    Beautifully written Tess! All great ideas and wonderful inspiration!
    Thanks!!

    Reply
  • Noel November 12, 2011, 7:03 am

    Yes, there are something that is more meaningful yet money can’t buy – our happiness and well being! Thanks for your Gift of Inspiration – inspired us to take care of ourselves~

    Reply

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Welcome! I'm Tess Marshall and I’m Passionate about supporting people who want to lead a fearless and bold life.
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