Dream An Impossible Dream

self-sabotage-22

I am currently making changes at The Bold Life. I will no longer be offering coaching. I am highly recommending our guest, Lana Kravtsova, for anyone who wants to live their dreams.

Lana Kravtsova, from "Dream Followers." Lana writes, facilitates and organizes personal growth group workshops in Atlanta, create products (new one is coming soon)  and does 1-1 coaching. 

In Lana's words "My blog Dream Followers is about getting in the flow.You get in the flow by knowing yourself first. It took me awhile to find myself taking layers and layers of fake stuff off.

Once I rediscovered myself, my passions and dreams –  ideas, people, opportunities started appearing in my life moving me forward toward my goals."

lana-kravtsova-23

Do you remember a time in your life when you had a goal you were really excited about- your soul was singing, your whole being felt inspired and energized when you thought about what your life would be like when you reached that goal?

Then something weird started happening. You were still excited but you started procrastinating, postponing the action you needed to take in order for you to reach that goal. 

You started doubting your abilities, worrying and finding excuses why not to take the next step. 

Then a thought came to your head that maybe you didn’t need that goal to begin with. Maybe you’d be better off doing something else. 

Thought after thought and finally you were completely convinced that this was not your goal, that you’d be better off finding something else to do. 

I bet all of us have been in situations like this one.  It’s OK when it happens once or twice. But if that is what is happening over and over again in your life and you find yourself settling for mediocre goals more and more often, you have to do something to stop this self-sabotage. 

Is this your True Goal? 

First thing to do is to check and see if the goal was really your true goal, if it was the desire coming from your soul, from your True Self. 

Those are the only goals that can make us truly happy when we reach them and that are aligned with our higher purpose in life.  

How do you know if the goal is the true goal? 

Sit quietly, forget about everything but the goal itself. 

Imagine yourself reaching it. Get into that feeling that you would experience when you reach it. 

Listen to your feelings. What do you feel?

Does your soul still sing? Do you still get excited and inspired?

 

 If yes, then most likely the goal is your true goal.

 

Another great way to test if the goal is your true goal is to ask yourself – would you be doing it if you could not fail? 

If there was no way for you to fail, if you could choose to be, do and have anything you want and could not fail, would you still be pursuing that goal? Or maybe you’d rather do something else? 

If you would still like to pursue that goal, then it is your True Goal.

So what happened? 

Why did you start doubting, procrastinating, finding excuses why not to do what needed to be done in order for you to reach it? Why did you start sabotaging yourself? 

Your mind got scared. 

Your soul wanted it, but the goal was too far out of the comfort zone for your mind. In other words your soul and mind were not aligned. 

Your soul usually knows your true desires. It knows what will make you happy. But it rarely can do anything if your mind doesn’t believe or feels scared. 

Your mind is the driver of the bus and it decides whether you are going to reach the goal or not. 

Your mind is very limited. It only knows what is possible depending on all the experiences you had in the past. It has certain beliefs of what you can or what you can’t do. 

You probably heard about limiting beliefs. Most of them you collected in your childhood, some of them you keep picking up throughout your whole life. 

Napoleon Hill said: “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve”. 

So how do you help your mind “conceive and believe”? How do you break through those limiting beliefs? How do you stop your mind from sabotaging you? 

There are tons of techniques out there. I am going to give the steps that I usually follow and that work the best in my opinion.

Visualization. Visualization is one of the most powerful transformational tools. It’s been used for centuries by many people to help them in reaching extraordinary results in many areas. 

Visualization convinces your mind that the goal is really in your comfort zone to reach. It makes your mind believe. 

Try visualizing for at least 10 minutes a day for a month. You’ll see the results, I promise. 

Conscious decision. Instead of being a victim of your subconscious beliefs or limits that were formed in the past, consciously commit yourself to reaching the goal despite any worries or fears you might have. Make a decision that you are going to do whatever it takes to reach that goal. 

Decide and commit. An interesting thing happens when you do that. You consciously stop paying attention to your worries and doubts. 

You most likely will still have them, we all do, but since you made a conscious decision and commitment, you’ll act despite those worries and doubts.  

The true commitment has a very profound effect on your mind. It makes a much deeper impression on it than just plainly setting goals or resolutions. 

Know your “why”. Write down all of the reasons why you want to reach the goal. 

How will you benefit from reaching it? How are you going to feel when you reach it? How other people will benefit? 

Having strong “whys” really motivates your mind and switches its attention from limitations to opportunities. 

Review your “whys” often, preferably every day making sure your motivation doesn’t fade. 

Link as much pleasure as possible to you reaching the goal. Your mind hates pain. It hates anything that presumably involves hard work and lots of striving. 

Consciously decide to stop any kind of thoughts that involve hard work, striving, suffering related to reaching your goal. 

Visualize yourself easily doing what it takes to reach it. Smile when you are taking the necessary steps. Purposefully make yourself excited as often as possible thinking about the goal.

If you actually do all of the above, you will get your mind on your side. As a result it will start helping you instead of sabotaging you.

 It will start noticing opportunities, people, bringing you ideas that will move your closer to your goal.

What about action?

Of course you’ll have to take action!  Most likely lots of action. Bold action. There might still be lots of hard work. 

But it is going to be so much easier to take that action now when your mind is convinced and helping you.  

Aligning your mind and your soul desires is the key to reaching the goals you set for yourself with less effort as well as feeling happy and fulfilled after you reach them.

Try it. It really works. 

If you’d like more help with visualization you can download guided visualization mp3 on my blog 

Lana is the founder and writer behind Dream Followers Blog. Her purpose in life is to help people live consciously, be their True Selves and dare to follow their dreams. She is also a founder and CPO (Chief Positivity Officer) at Positivity Place – growing community in Atlanta, GA of people who believe that living with Passion and Purpose and following their true dreams rocks. You can follow her on Twitter.  

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Lana-Dreamfollowers.com February 17, 2010, 11:34 am

    Hi Tess, thank you so much for an opportunity to guest post on your fabulous blog. I really appreciate it! Here is to dreaming impossible dreams!
    .-= Lana-Dreamfollowers.com´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Jannie Funster February 17, 2010, 11:46 am

    I do believe it is time for me to sit and visualize how I will feel when I reach my goals, both small and big. I LOVE that idea, Lana!! I’ve felt a little pulled in many directions of late. Refocussing on where I want to be is probably a very good next move for me. Thank you so much.

    And Tess, I hope that your decision to no longer coach will mean you’ll still be blogging here, to fill our hearts with your infectious joy?? I sure hope so!!

    xo
    .-= Jannie Funster´s last post…5 More BIG Photos — Whoo-hoo. (and a poll, in case you’d missed it in the sidebar.) =-.

  • Quinn February 17, 2010, 12:07 pm

    Lara- This is so true. I started changing my life after i took the time to understand what i love and want to do. Getting in touch with what i truly wanted to do has given me the energy and motivation to stop drifting and charting the course of my life.

    Tess thanks for the introduction to Lara’s writing it is good stuff.
    .-= Quinn´s last post…Acting positively =-.

  • Lana-Dreamfollowers.com February 17, 2010, 12:19 pm

    @Jannie, visualization is definitely a huge help when you need more focus on your goals. I am a big believer in it and it worked wonders in my life. Give it a try and please let me know if I can help you with anything.

    @Quinn, absolutely, I can so relate to your experience, clarity truly is magical thing, once we get truly clear on who we are and what we want, life transforms. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
    .-= Lana-Dreamfollowers.com´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Caity February 17, 2010, 12:21 pm

    Tess, I agree with Jannie – I hope you will still be blogging here! I hope you will explain what you meant by your statement that you will no longer be coaching!

    This is a fantastic post Lana. Thank you for sharing it with us. I definitely think it is time to reassess what my goals are and try to reach for them. I find I am quite often putting them off for one reason or another.

  • Fatibony February 17, 2010, 1:10 pm

    Hi Lana, I love the concept of writing down why we want to reach a goal, I generally create a to do list/goal list most days , but will start reviewing the ‘whys’ every so often I suppose this will strength our goals. Thanks
    .-= Fatibony´s last post…Aaarrrggghhh!! What do you do when angry? =-.

  • Lana-Dreamfollowers.com February 17, 2010, 2:32 pm

    @Caity, thank you! When our goals are out of our comfort zone (our mind is not aligned with our soul), that’s exactly what happens, we find reasons and excuses to not take action. I hope the techniques I outlined help you to get back on track.

    @Fatibony Absolutely! I used to focus on “what” for a long time in my life and only after I realized the importance of “whys” my motivation skyrocketed. And that’s what we really need to make things happen – lots of motivation.
    .-= Lana-Dreamfollowers.com´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Paul February 17, 2010, 4:06 pm

    Lana, thank you for your inspiring post. Avery straight forward and easy to follow process. the visualisation, I’ve found to be particularly powerful. The emphasis on action cannot be stressed highly enough.

    I’ll certainly be able to make use of the mp3.

    Thank you for sharing this.

    Regards

    Paul
    .-= Paul´s last post…Self Esteem =-.

  • Joy February 17, 2010, 4:06 pm

    Wow I love this post! I think my personal motto is along the lines of “making the impossible quite possible indeed” 🙂 Life is too short to experience anything but *all* that it personally has to offer you on your level in your own life!

    Tess–I agree with the others–please say that your decision to release coaching is not the same as releaseing your blog!!! And if it is, then I know whatever you choose to focus on will blossom in magnificent ways:) It may quite selfish to “hold on to you” but man, we all love you so!!!!

  • Tess February 17, 2010, 4:53 pm

    Lana,
    I’m blessed to have found you! Thanks for coming over and introducing yourself.

    Jannie,
    Me quit blogging never. I’d have to find another addiction;) Visualize Jannie, lots of CD’s and fun!

    Quinn,

    You’ll never regret you did that. I know you’ll continue as well…the world needs you!

    Caity,
    Silly that just means what it says, “I’m no longer coaching. I’ll be here blogging and doing other fun things. Not to worry!

    Fatibony,
    Yes reviewing, “why-ing” and writing them down are both so powerful. I wish you all the success and dreams coming true in the world.

    Paul,
    Yes the truth is we have to take consistent, persistent and bold action. I have a feeling you do just that!

  • Hulbert February 17, 2010, 4:59 pm

    Nice post Lana. It’s really important that we dream big, even though they may be outside of our initial reach. The tips on visualization and taking action are 2 of the most effective factors I think to achieving dreams that we may feel are impossible. I liked how you have outlined this entire article for us and shared what steps we need to take in over to overcome our biggest obstacles.
    .-= Hulbert´s last post…Do Your Blogging Struggles Still Bother You? =-.

  • Jacqui February 17, 2010, 6:25 pm

    Go Lana! So great to see you doing a guest post here. Keep up the momentum! You are doing great and are an inspiration to me! Much love, Jacqui xxx
    .-= Jacqui´s last post…How thoughts affect your feelings =-.

  • remowill February 17, 2010, 6:42 pm

    Very good Lana. Thanks for the information.

  • Lana - DreamFollowers Blog February 17, 2010, 6:45 pm

    @Paul, thank you, action definitely cannot be overemphasized. The difference is in taking action that feel like pushing or taking action that feel natural. Both work of course, it’s just that the last one is more fun.

    @Joy I love your motto. It is indeed quite possible!

    @Hulbert thank you Hulbert, I think visualization and taking action are the biggies too:)

    @Jacqui, thank you dear, you are quite an inspiration yourself!
    .-= Lana – DreamFollowers Blog´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Evita February 17, 2010, 7:40 pm

    Hi Lana

    Thank you for this wonderful reminder about finding and getting to know our true selves. And I loved how you focused on knowing the difference of whether something is coming from our true selves. I find a lot of people are convinced that they know what they want but upon looking further see it really came from peer pressure, ego or other external factors. So reflection and authenticity is key in following our dreams.

    Thank you Tess for a great guest!
    .-= Evita´s last post…On the Pilgrimage of Life: Talking With Bernie Krausse About A Special Journey =-.

  • Anastasiya February 17, 2010, 8:55 pm

    Hi Lana, you wrote a great guest post summarizing a lot of key points that you have shared on your blog. Limiting beliefs are horrible for anybody. We usually do not allow others to say that we cannot do something but we keep mentioning it to ourselves all the time. Breaking through that wall of ignorance and fear is the most important step if you reach any of your dreams.
    .-= Anastasiya´s last post…The Only Way to Bring Your Life into Balance Right Now =-.

  • Karl Staib - Work Happy Now February 17, 2010, 9:09 pm

    I’m a big fan of linking pleasure during a tough process. I sometimes have difficulty finishing a project. I love the act of creating, but I hate the refining part of it. I would rather write up a 300 page storm and let someone else edit it. Unfortunately I’m not at Wayne Dyer’s level yet, so I have to edit all my own stuff. Instead of just procrastinating. I listen to really uplifting music and I visualize myself editing a great book, article, whatever and I get my motivation back on track.

    Great stuff, Lana. And now that you have Tess’s endorsement you must be good. 🙂
    .-= Karl Staib – Work Happy Now´s last post…10 Ways to Unclutter Your Mind =-.

  • Lana-Dreamfollowers.com February 18, 2010, 1:05 am

    @Evita, absolutely. Everything starts from knowing yourself first. “Know Thyself” after all was proclaimed the key to happiness for centuries. Authenticity definitely rules:)

    @Anastasiya, so true, all limitations are in our mind only and if we can break through them, we can reach anything.

    @Karl, I am exactly the same with “details”. I like creating but all the details that come afterwords like editing, traffic, etc just put me down. Definitely helps to do somethings that inspires and motivates you to help you get through it. We’ll get to Wayne Dyer’s level soon:)
    .-= Lana-Dreamfollowers.com´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord February 18, 2010, 6:10 am

    WOW! It’s like she was inside my head for the first few paragraphs there! This is an incredibly useful, inspirational, easy-to-follow post and that I want to tell all of my friends about. GREAT tips, and one paragraph, in particular, is getting printed out and posted to my desk… as I continue to take steps to achieve my goals.

    Tess – GREAT guest author. WOW! I can’t say the w-word enough.
    Lana – you’re inspirational. Many thanks for jump-starting my day!
    .-= Megan “JoyGirl!” Bord´s last post…Underwear in the Jungle! =-.

  • Stacey Shipman February 18, 2010, 7:51 am

    My phrase for this year is “go for it”. We all have dreams, no need to waste time not trying to attain them! And as I watch the Olympics this week it becomes more clear (as I already knew) that time, effort, patience, risk, a strong support system and a never give up attitude (Look at how many injuries they talk about with the athletes and they’re still winning gold medals!) are some of what you need to make it happen. I always said, “Other people are doing it. Why can’t I!”

    Tess, can’t wait to hear about your new direction. Thanks for introducing us to Lana.
    .-= Stacey Shipman´s last post…FGL TV Stretch Break! Chair stretch for hips and lower back =-.

  • suzen February 18, 2010, 8:26 am

    Hi Tess! Aha, changes, eh? I know whatever it is, it will be good! Seems to be in the air now – lots of blogs I’m reading are shifting, changing, re-aligning with something new and different. It’s exciting!!!!

    Hi Lana! Well if you aren’t just spot on with this! Great job! Very inspirational and motivational. I swear, having a “Can Do!” attitude about things is the most rewarding, enriching and FUN thing ever! I have self-taught myself SOOO much over my lifetime that I cannot imagine who/what I’d be like now had I not been a member of the Can Do club! Even the things I didn’t do well, I still had fun doing!
    Life’s a banquet – bring a big plate!
    Hugs
    suZen
    .-= suzen´s last post…Discoveries in Being Hip – It’s CODE =-.

  • J.D. Meier February 18, 2010, 10:42 am

    Good stuff.

    I’m a fan of leading from the inside out and starting with your why.

    Goals are powerful tools when we know they’re waypoints, not endpoints.

    Values and our personal missions end up being our best compass … when you know your “ends” values vs. your “means” values (e.g. you want the feeling of “freedom”, not the Ferarri.)

    Great point on linking pleasure … pain and pleasure are some of our best forces to get on our side to stack ourselves for success. Nothing beats knowing how to press your own buttons.

  • Hilary February 18, 2010, 11:22 am

    Hi Tess – you’ve obviously weighed all the pros and cons re coaching and decided to move your talents in other directions, which we’ll hear about I’m sure. Just glad you’re not giving up the blogging lark!

    Hi Lana .. welcome to Tess’ world and all the way over in Atlanta. I love the way you link the fact the mind does not like pain, but that hurdle has to be overcome to succeed and to be kept in the winning frame all the time.

    Good to meet you and excellent Dreaming the Possible Dream ..
    .-= Hilary´s last post…Collop Monday , Shrove Tuesday, Amazing Grace and Ash Crosses =-.

  • Phil - Less Ordinary Llving February 18, 2010, 11:58 am

    Lana – great guest post. I love the graphic. It reminds me of a few years ago when I took voice coaching. After a few sessions, my coach pointed out that I’d spent the last 30 minutes telling her how difficult it was to make changes. I had not noticed this, however on reflection it became apparent that I was doing this across the board once I got to the edge of my comfort zone. Once I stopped telling myself how hard things were, life got much easier immediately.

    Thank you

    Phil
    .-= Phil – Less Ordinary Llving´s last post…Get off the Hamster Wheel =-.

  • vered - blogger for hire February 18, 2010, 12:38 pm

    “Link as much pleasure as possible to you reaching the goal” – I think this is great advice and certainly one of the best ways to encourage you to keep working (in a positive way!) towards achieving your goal.
    .-= vered – blogger for hire´s last post…Spring =-.

  • Lana - DreamFollowers Blog February 18, 2010, 3:17 pm

    @Megan, I am so thrilled you found this useful and thank you so much for your kind words. You jump started my day!

    @Stacey, watching Olympics is a great inspiration for me too. Even if not Olympics, I think we can find that kind of inspiration every day to give us a little boost. Exactly – if they can, so can I !

    @suzen – yay for the Can Do Club, I’d love to join you. And so true, even if we don’t do something that well, we have fun, we dare and that’s what life is all about.

    @JD I like the Ferrari – Freedom example, so often we keep focusing on Ferrari and wonder why we don’t get it. Defining your true whys is the key.

    @Hilary, great to meet you too, and yes, we don’t like pain, so why not to use it as a motivator to move us forward.

    @Phil change is often immediate, once we realize what needs to be changed inside. Thank you for commenting!

    @vered , yes! link as much pleasure to you reaching the goal and link as much pain to you not recahing it. Our mind is smart, it will figure out quickly what needs to be done to move away from pain towards pleasure.
    .-= Lana – DreamFollowers Blog´s last post…you won’t love THERE if you don’t love HERE first =-.

  • Chris Edgar February 18, 2010, 11:06 pm

    Hi Tess — when I read the first few lines of your post I immediately thought “whoa, what’s going on? What’s next for Tess?” But you’re keeping us in suspense, aren’t you? 🙂

  • Peggy February 19, 2010, 10:00 am

    Tess,

    Thank you so much for introducing Lana. I’m printing this post out and keeping with me!
    .-= Peggy´s last post…Save Me A Good Seat… =-.

  • Kaushik | beyond-karma.com February 20, 2010, 4:45 pm

    Hi Lana,
    You’ve given a wonderful reminder. Even when we know that our goals are true, we can still run into inertia and the conflicts of beliefs. We can run into fear. Awareness, autheticity and letting go are the keys.

    Thanks!

    k

  • Jonique February 21, 2010, 7:27 pm

    I love reading your guests posts almost as much as I enjoy yours! I have an award for you on my blog…because everyone needs a bit of sunshine. Keep up the good work!
    .-= Jonique´s last post…Sunshine Award =-.

  • jonathanfigaro February 22, 2010, 9:21 am

    We can do anything we put our minds too. Its up to us to think we can! Rather than think we can’t.

  • Matthew Dent February 23, 2010, 9:32 am

    Great post Lana,
    It all starts with “Thinking Big!” Give yourself permission, commit, and don’t stop until your dream becomes your reality. Thanks for sharing.
    .-= Matthew Dent´s last post…Give Yourself Permission to Think Big =-.

  • Doug February 25, 2010, 1:10 am

    I like this post but I absolutely disagree that the mind is the driver of the bus. It thinks it is and if you buy into the illusion that it is, then… it is. The mind reinforces its own perceptions so if you transcend your feelings and beliefs with your ability to think about your thoughts you can realise (hard though it is) that the mind lies to you about what you can and cannot do. NLP is all about ‘driving your own bus’ but the first thing you have to realise is that the bus wants to drive itself!!! thanks for the post.

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